The Joke Thread (NWS)

[Tyler]

I love that joke

 

[MAauto101]

What is doo + trice = shfifty five.

 

[Chris]

It isn't really NWS, but I'm still going to hell for it....

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

Because he had no arms.

 

[TheNailman]

:slow rimshot:........

 

[TheNailman]

what's the difference between jam and marmalade?

 

[LGHT SBR]

"I recently asked my friend's little girl what she wanted to be when she grows up. She said she wanted to be President some day. Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, 'If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?'
She replied, 'I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people.'

Her parents beamed, and said "Welcome to the Democrat Party!"

'Wow...what a worthy goal.' I told her, 'But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that. You can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house.'

She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me straight in the eye and asked, 'Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?' I smiled and said, 'Welcome to the Republican Party.'

Her parents still aren't speaking to me."

Funny!

 

[LGHT SBR]

what's the difference between jam and marmalade?

Think of Jam as being pureed, while marmalade is cut up, and mashed. Whats the difference for you sir?

 

[TheNailman]

that joke is good. .....but missing buttsex.

 

[EddieHunt05]

A boy is riding his new bike that he got for Christmas down the road. At a stop sign an officer comes up along side of him on Horse Back.. The police officer ask " Did you get that bike for Christmas young man?" The little boy replays " Yes sir I did." The officer then says " well it's to bad I'm going to have to give you a ticket for having no reflectors." The little boy ask " Sir did you get that horse for Christmas?" The officer admiring the young boy " Why Yes I did." The boy then says " Well next time tell Santa to put the dick on the bottom and not the top."

Get it

 

[LGHT SBR]

that joke is good. .....but missing buttsex.

This should be good

 

[TheNailman]

too hairy.. . . i should delete it for that reason

 

[LGHT SBR]

It just maybe, but you might just be a little too picky about your pussy Phil! I remember the times when chics didn't shave'em all up like they do now a days.

 

[TheNailman]

those were dark, dark times. . ....

i appoligise to any women listening who disagree, but a lady should have ZERO hair from the head down.

 

[EddieHunt05]

Not even a landing strip? haha

 

[TheNailman]

what's the difference between jam and marmalade?

you can't marmalade your cock down a girl's throat.

 

[Chris]

you can't marmalade your cock down a girl's throat.

 

[IBratmanI]

:lol:

 

[GClark]

those were dark, dark times. . ....
i appoligise to any women listening who disagree, but a lady should have ZERO hair from the head down.

I hate hair on the ol' vagary.

 

[Chris]

I hate hair on the ol' vagary.

Old? what are you doing with old ones? ew...

 

[TheNailman]

ew